1959

[fiery_ring]

It's dark when Carlotta emerges with Teja and Egil. The audience are making their way home, and the circus folk are winding down for the night.

Comments

[fiery_ring]

"That's a shame." Carlotta says.

She considers, as she watches her two children going to get ready for bed.

"I think the bar tends to do that with people who have been coming a while. It's like we have our turn to be helped and then it's someone else's. I wonder why it has picked me up again now."

[ostro_goth]

'Maybe you need us again," Teja muses. "Or we, you."

[fiery_ring]

"Maybe. It would have made more sense if it had picked up Molly." Carlotta says. "She's just a few years younger than I was."

[ostro_goth]

"We never worked out why it brings some people, and not others," Teja says. "At least we can all come here now."

[fiery_ring]

Carlotta is quiet for a moment.

"I'm not sure I want Molly and Bobbie to have a door." she says. "Some of the things that happen in the bar are rather heavy. But I'm glad they can see you, again."

[ostro_goth]

"You dealt with the heavy stuff just fine," Teja points out.

[fiery_ring]

Small smile.

"I know. I owe my life to the bar. Doesn't mean there weren't a few close shaves. You have the same worries about Egil, I'm sure."

[ostro_goth]

"If one takes care of a child, the world seems much more dangerous than it was when one was a child oneself," Teja nods.

[fiery_ring]

"Bobbie can be a little headstrong." Carlotta says. "He gets that from me, but I think he still bears a grudge against his father."

[ostro_goth]

"They would feel abandoned," Teja says. "No matter what precisely happened."

[fiery_ring]

"Well, I don't think he knows about the cheating." Carlotta says. "He knows about the drinking and the stealing, and he knows that's why Will and I are divorced now. Will sends his maintenance, but they don't have contact. We still see his parents and sister."

[ostro_goth]

"And do they see Will?"

[fiery_ring]

"No." Carlotta shakes her head. "They did initially, but it's hit and miss whether he turns up sober. I stopped contact because I felt it was having a bad effect on the children."

[ostro_goth]

"What sent him on such a slide?" Teja says. "He used to be decent."

[fiery_ring]

"The war." Carlotta answers simply. "He was a pilot. He never got over what he did to civilians on the other side."

She sighs. "However, eventually I had to put the kids first. I excused drunken cheating the first few times. When it happened a third time, enough was enough. He caused my first circus to go bust because he was taking money from the till for drink."

[ostro_goth]

Teja nods. "There is no way o get help for him?"

[fiery_ring]

"He had a psychiatrist for a while. Malcolm Crowe spent some time with him too." Carlotta says. "His parents continue to try and get him help."

[ostro_goth]

"I am truly sorry to hear that," Teja says, "for indeed, not all that suffer can be saved."

[fiery_ring]

"He has to do some of the saving himself." Carlotta says. "I can't do it all for him."

[ostro_goth]

"Indeed, that is true," Teja nods.

[fiery_ring]

"Sometimes things just don't work out." Carlotta says. "I think without the war, we would have lived happily ever after. But I have two lovely children, and I have built my life up again."

[ostro_goth]

"Have you found another that you would love?" Teja asks.

[fiery_ring]

"No." Carlotta shakes her head.

"I don't think Bobbie would accept another father figure."

[ostro_goth]

"It is not for him to choose," Teja says.

[fiery_ring]

"It's not." Carlotta says. "But it's his childhood too. Besides, the caravan would be very cramped with four."